Friday, February 10, 2006

Cancer Help Requested

I'm a big proponent of personal responsibility. I can't stand the way our society has managed to shift the blame to everyone else. Read any newspaper. Watch TV. No one ever just says, "Yeah, you're right, it's my fault and I take the blame!" I believe this will cripple our society in the future (as if it already hasn't, lol).

One thing I try to keep in mind at all times is that I'm not always correct, and I should take the blame as fast as possible when I'm wrong, then immediately go about apologizing to the offended party. I have no problem whatsoever admitting when I'm wrong, nor apologizing about it.

Take that PLO8 tourney we played last month. I said a couple of things that I shouldn't have said. I wrote up an apology to the poker blogging community at large, then published it as soon as I possibly could.

I also believe in taking responsibility for things that aren't necessarily even "my fault" and refuse to place the blame higher if I can simply stop the buck here. Why whine to a complaining customer that the mistake "wasn't my fault" and that I will transfer him or her to the responsible party when I am able to apologize for the inconvenience and take care of the situation right here and now?

In that vein, I feel responsible for not addressing a few issues here that should have been taken care of a week or more ago.

I get this odd feeling when someone else tells me that they are suffering from cancer, or that they are terminally ill. It's like that pre-vomit feeling one gets. The bile rises and my body shudders slightly. I almost want to cry. Maybe because I don't cry I have a worse psychological response? I don't know what it is, but I guess the whole cancer thing is still too close for me to respond in the correct manner immediately.

Today I'm ready to take responsibility.

So without further ado, here is my belated message.

On February 2nd, Glyphic posted a plea for help. Obviously Christine is not being offered much hope, but this is her only hope, and I thought she would get an outpouring of emotional support. Instead, Glyphic got one spammer comment, and mine. Sad. If a "popular" blogger announces that her pet hamster died, she gets 50 comments. What a world we live in.
On January 31st, it was announced that a member of the Full Tilt Forum is currently at Johns Hopkins being treated for Leukemia. She, also needs a bone marrow transplant. I was asked to help spread the news, yet I put it off for days. I apologize.

It makes me sick that I put these messages off, although I have nothing but time on my hands. I am also humiliated that I could continue to be part of a community that constantly ignores emergency requests like the ones above, in favor of posts about drinking contests, joke "charity" events and insulting pictures. I am guilty of this.

While we all must stay humorous at times in order to cope with catastrophic things that happen in our lives (Bill's parody of my cancer diagnosis), when it ALL becomes a big joke, and I start purposely ignoring real requests for help, something is definitely not right.

I am humbled and humiliated. I apologize to the community, and I hope to face these real issues when help is first asked of me in the future.