I've been bubbling a lot online. 10th in a Stud tourney when the top five pay. 130th in an O8 tourney when the top 100 pay. Stuff like that. I'm too tight, and a tight, conservative player cannot make it as a tourney pro. I'm trying to loosen up, oy.
Last night at the last second I entered a Razz tourney. I built myself up to 2k early, then got moved to a new table. The first hand there, I got three to a bike: A45. The only other low cards out were two fives, bonus! I completed and fired away on every street. One of the fives stayed with me. I made a 7543A right away, he rivered a 7542A. Ugh.
Immediately afterwards, I got another bike draw: A35. Got outdrawn on that one, too, bah. Now I was down to 400 in chips, and when I got A27 I was committed. By fifth I made my 8-low, and went all-in. Another guy had a draw at a seven, and caught an ace on the river to beat me. C'est la vie.
This is why so many people hate Razz, and go nuts playing it. It is my one advantage. I never dwell upon these beats, really. It's just some crazy game and no one ever knows what the next card will be off the top of the deck. No matter how live you are drawing, no matter how horrible someone else is drawing, it is still a 52 card deck, and you can only go in with the best of it, but can't be horrified if the luck of the draw doesn't go your way. You just go on. Each hand is a separate entity, and if you let a bad beat affect your subsequent play, you are simply giving money to a player like me, who doesn't concern themselves psychologically with the last hand.
One day this is going to put me into the John Juanda/Ted Forrest arena, but right now, I'm too tight, only playing cinch hands, and playing them too conservatively, at that. I have a giant hole in my game, a mountain to overcome, but I'll get there one day :)